I'm a really clever guy.
When I'm writing about stuff 'in my ballpark'. And since this is my blog, I have the luxury of sticking to that category. So you all stay totally impressed.
But not today, because a weird thing happened to me the other day.
As you may have guessed by my last post, I'm experiencing stress these days. And usually, when I drive in my truck, I listen to interviews with thought leaders who talk about the things they... lead... thought... in. But when I'm stressed out, learning goes out the window. So I switched it to the radio.
And then a song came on. And I did something really uncomfortable.
When the song was done, I turned off the radio, and as I left the car, I felt a little cheap, like someone had just busted into my head and rearranged the furniture without my permission. I actually found myself resenting the song for making me identify with it.
Which is weird for me, because I used to play guitar and sing in church, like all the time, and music was a huge part of my life in college and high school. And now, I find myself feeling like it's for the weak.
Here's the best I can describe it: I spend a lot of time working on my mental space. Thinking positively, believing that bad luck is a golden learning opportunity, and that I can create (most of) the circumstances that will lead to my continued improvement and success as a human being.
And then that song came on the radio. And it managed to get backstage and whisper a couple haunting words to the superstar right before the big performance.
I can't figure out if this is a good thing or a bad thing. Here's why: I am a hard worker. And the way to get to the next step is not to sit back and let a song make you feel bad. It's to put your head down, and work your ass off till you hit the next smooth patch and you can let off the pedals a bit.
Don't get me wrong. This isn't a denial thing. It's a persistence and inner strength thing. I'm fully willing to acknowledge that hard stuff is hard. But feeling bad is a waste of energy, right? It is what it is, so deal with it. Right?
Yet ever since this happened on Sunday, I've been kind of haunted by it. Help me, friends.
What is music's role in this stuff? I don't want to just sit around and mope. What's to be gained from listening to a song that describes your negative state? Can music be restorative? That's a lot to ask! People pay a lot more for cognitive behavioural therapy than they do for an iTunes download for a reason.
I was totally caught off guard by my reaction to that song. I felt like it busted me feeling a way I wasn't 'supposed' to be feeling. I want to hear your take on it. Is music for the strong, or the weak? Is it an escape, or is it edifying? Of course there's good and bad. But is there a role for it in all this? Or is it a way that we let ourselves off the hook by giving our emotions some instant gratification?
Please comment below.